Oh what a night! It was one for the ages, Jess-Heads. Uncle Jesse invaded Madison Square Garden and, in front of tens of thousands of screaming fans, went to battle with Zack Morris, Vin Diesel, Matthew McCoughaghneayhey, Jack Bauer (of TV's 24 Years), and none other than the "Bearded Clam" himself, Chuck Norris! It was a brutal spectacle, not for the faint of heart, but we were on hand to witness all of the taint-busting action. What are you waiting for, McGarnigle? Check the results right here.

Uncle Jesse has updated his Diary

Several new Facts have been added

More Fan Mail will be posted next week. Keep an eye out to see if your letter shows up

Uncle Jesse has received several hundred internship submissions. Don't forget, UJ will be hand selecting an intern to assist him with daily sweetness (mostly by buying him mayonnaise when he asks for it...and when he doesn't). We'll announce the lucky winner on April 1, 2006. 

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Uncle Jesse also invented paint